Ha ha, thats how I feel today. Writing in the blog feels like I’m sending my thoughts into a black hole, and I have no idea where it really goes.
Also reminds me of the movie “in the mood for love” by Wong Kar Wai, where the movie ends with a secret being whispered into a hole and covered up forever. I loved that movie, highly recommend it!
As for today
Bkfast: Oatmeal ! Oatmeal usually makes me feel too heavy or the milk in it makes me kind of sick, but today was perfect. I tried the pre-packaged oats with flax seeds sold at TJ’s.
Lunch: Vegetarian burrito (around 350 calories with less than 100 being fat) I know cause it also came from a TJ’s container 
Dinner: Homemade pizza, my most favourite at home dinner! no cheese except parmesan, lots of veggies and a half whole wheat, half all purpose flour handmade dough. I use Mitch’s recipe.
The husband loved it and ate 3 pizza’s! I ate 2 and maybe a quarter. No leftovers either – all of it was wiped out!
Sanity check
I am feeling much better today – after staying up last night and reading about facing my fears. I have been avoiding interviewing and such over the past month or so for some SERIOUS fear of rejection. I actually have a physical reaction to interviewing now. Like heart palpitations, sweat, a very high anxiety level etc and I caught myself going back there when a recruiter called today. Over the past month I didnt want to receive any more rejection phone calls or emails – but this one quote stuck with me. You maybe faced with many many “no’s” but you have to realize that all it takes is one “yes”.
My need for everyone to like me – makes me want everyone to say yes, here is your new job. But instead I get rejection after rejection and so I stop trying, to spare myself the torture. But I tell myself – all you need is one “yes”. Lets hope that comes soon, and turns out to be the right match.
This last few lines almost sound like I am looking for a husband – and the quote “you have to kiss a few frogs until you find your prince” is truly representative of my job search, and I have been kissing a lot of frogs! urgh!
Have a wonderful 2010